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Ahhh, it's about that time of year again. I really can't believe it has been a year since I wrote my last end-of-year blog post! Time really flies. I constantly thought about whether or not I should write this because of my pretty tumultuous year...but I decided to, because so many people email me after I do, expressing how much it has inspired them, helped them, or simply made them feel like they're not alone in this world. Last year, I expressed so much about my life to you...and I really wanted to hold back this year to protect so many, including myself, but I thought, these discovery posts, wouldn't be what they are, without me being honest!

I usually have a list to begin each year, but for 2011 I have decided to have no plans or lists whatsoever. I thought maybe I'd share with you some things to live by, to possibly make your life a little more cheery, as well as the people around you. You see, I witnessed and learned so many things in 2010, and I came to realize that making plans and wishes, are somewhat pointless, as things hardly ever go that way. So I said, I might as well just go along with each day, enjoying each moment, and understanding that whatever it is I wish for or want, will come to me when I truly LIVE! So here goes....

* It really doesn't matter what anyone says...it's always best to do what works for you. I lived in New York for 5 years, and there were many times when I wanted to come back home....to be specific, 2008 was the year I was ready. My grandmother had passed, and I became this totally lost soul, not knowing which way to turn. On one hand I wanted to stay to accomplish what I had gone there for; to not hurt a good person, or disappoint my parents. On the other hand, I wanted to come right back to be with my family, to something that I thought was true, and to focus on my passion 100%. I ended up staying....but when I found myself in tears all over again, all alone in an apartment, I really wanted to leave. It wasn't until I told my mother how I felt, and she told me it does not matter what anyone thinks or says....if it's  going to make me happy, just do it. You have no idea how long I fought to stay in NY,  just because I was afraid of disappointing the people around me....when really, I was only preventing myself from happiness!  Rule #1: Be Happy For You! Read the rest of this article »

With the beginning of a not so great week...I found these words very comforting! They were written by a lovely photographer, (whose blog I follow) named Elizabeth Messina! And I dedicate this post to my friend who showed me today, that I'm not the only one...she knows who she is!

It really is amazing how much time flies. I woke up one morning...looked at my calender and realized that half of the year is almost up! So of course I took a look at my list to see what I had accomplished, and noticed I had only done a few things. I have been exercising, eating healthier, reading and kinda sorta saving. I guess it's better than nothing, but being an over-achiever...I'm not exactly a happy camper. I recently started to read a book called "The Happiness Project", where the author (Gretchen Rubin) dedicated each month of the year, to something on her list to help her become a happier person! This inspired me to redo my list for the year. So here it is...my end of 2010 commandments!

1. Live in the moment—I have found that I'm always trying to look into the future, and we all know I wasn't blessed with psychic powers. I guess I haven't really been that person to sit, relax and enjoy things for what they are....which isn't necessarily a good thing. So I live...teaching myself to live each day....because if I'm not now here, I'm nowhere.

2. Make it happen—There are too many times I get lazy when it comes to meeting the people I admire, or doing the work needed for my business! It's time to make dreams come true.

3. Accept my friends—I have pretty high expectations of everyone that comes into my life, which of course leads to disappointments most of the time. For the rest of the year, I'd like to accept my friends for who they are. Not everyone will do the things I would do for them...and that's okay!

4. Let it go—This is self-explanatory! I do hold onto things longer than I should...I'm sure if I learned to let it go and not give a hoot-nanny, I'd be waaayyyy happier than I am now!

5. Help others—It could be someone I've never met, or simply a friend....either way I will put my bs aside, and help those who need a hand, shoulder, or ear! Read the rest of this article »

So if you read this blog regularly, you'd know that my recent distress has been my 20/20 vision going slowly! So I got my eyes tested, and found out that I am now slightly near sighted! Since then, I have been in serious depress-mode! But on Friday, I picked up my new glasses, and as I walked home, I realized that even though my sight is now a little blurry, the good thing is I can still see...that's my blessing! So, this weekend I embraced them...and was really thankful that my sight could be corrected by a simple piece of plastic! Here's a lovely quote for you, which made my day as I walked home last week....life isn't about how to survive the storm but how to dance in the rain. So I dance... four-eyed and all! Enjoy!

As I sat on the train one day listening to my ipod, the Intro to J.Cole's mixtape "The Warm Up" was randomly chosen to play through my ears. I swear this plays whenever I'm about to do something that relates to my dream....almost like a reminder to keep pushing. When I spoke to my father the other day, and we talked about rebellious teens, I asked him if I ever was rebellious. He said no, but I was very strong-willed. Whenever I made a decision, that's the way it was going to go and no one could stop me. When I heard that, I remember making the decision to move to New York. I had the choice of going to London, but because I heard that NY was more of a challenge for new designers, I said that's where I'm going. Read the rest of this article »

So we all know that this is the year that I will be dusting off that piece of paper, that holds the list of successful people I would like to meet. Yay! Well I thought I would share this experience by telling you who I'm going to try and reach, then if and when I do meet them...let you know all that I learned. These are all in my attempts to becoming someone successful...and the best way to learn is from those who have done so already. So, the first person on my list this year is Thalia Lyn...probably because she may be the easiest to get a hold of, but I admire her immensely, and I think if I start off this project with her, I will be ready to rumble for the others. Read the rest of this article »

Two of the things on my list for 2010 were exercise and eating healthy....so these will be the topic of discussion on my first 2010 discovery post.

So...if you don't know me by now, I am a candy fiend. If I see gummie bears anywhere...you better believe I'll be stuffing my mouth with them. So this year I cut out a lot of my candy intake, as well as other sweets...sigh. It has been a hard task, but I realized after a few weeks, my ridiculous cravings subsided, and I didn't need some kind of dessert after each meal. I also stopped eating out. Almost every New Yorker will tell you they don't have time to prepare any kind of food...we all eat out A LOT due to our work schedules (and the other things that make our lives oh so busy). I was a part of that group, but now I've been preparing my meals each day and even cooking (enter shocked face here*)! And the best part about preparing my own food...I've been saving quite a bit of money...YAY to a bigger pocket! 

Now, as for exercise....in 2007 I found out I had a slight curvature of the spine. My grandmother also had it, so I talked to her and she told me very sternly that I must, must, must exercise. It has been hard waking up to go the gym...especially during the winter season. But, those days when I'm just over it, (especially when I find that the changes I should see in my body are taking a lot longer than when I was in my early 20s) I just remember that this task is really and truly for my health. And once I have that focus...the super summer body will come along with it...in time! <3

I know that it's now January 6th, but I wrote this before the new year....twice I might add, and both posts didn't save. Grrr. Sooo third time is a charm right?? 

At the beginning of each year I usually make a mental list of things that I want to accomplish within the 12 months. I think 2009 was my year to grow and let go, and I made a list to help me do that. This year my list is smaller and to the point, so let's break the bugger down to the details.

Read the rest of this article »

I can't believe it's December already! That means it has been 7 months since I made my list. So I decided that because of my great day and the busy weeks I have ahead of me, that I would write about where I am at this point in my life.

Thinking Positively—I honestly think this comes from having faith. Since I changed my whole outlook and started to really believe in God, negative thinking has decreased. Why? I have accepted the fact that failure, disappointment, and challenges are all a part of life. And now I know that no matter what, I will get through anything once I believe.

Network—I have to admit that I haven't really been focusing on this part of my list. Most know that winter isn't my best friend...I usually go to work, and go right back home during this horrible season. But I have made it my duty to start, January 1st 2010.

Exercise Daily—I was doing really well at first, but one word will explain why I kinda stopped—WINTER! All I want to do is eat bread and sleep.

Eat Healthy— I have been making a conscious effort to eat better and man does it kill my pocket. But, I realize that my body is a temple...so if I don't nourish it properly, my spirit will be a hot mess. Read the rest of this article »

This week my Aunt Joyce passed away. She was my grandmother's sister, and when I sat in my cubicle remembering her, I smiled remembering the times we used to run away from her wet kisses on holidays. Aunt Joyce has been in a nursing home probably my whole life, but what I have been grateful for is the fact that I went with my Grandma to visit her and spent time talking to her. After my Grandma passed, my mom would ask me to deliver some things to Aunt Joyce, and when I went, I  would park and go inside to sit with her. I talked to her even though she could barely hear me. It's those moments in my life that I will truly treasure.

So, I have been working on finding a volunteer project to do once or twice a month in New York. I feel like even though I am trying to find my own happiness, I really should give some of my time to helping those less fortunate. My first volunteer project was to help knit warm clothing for the homeless. I learned how to knit in 2005 by my friend JLS, and since then I have been hooked. I pretty much only know one stitch, and I signed up for this volunteer project to see if I could learn more. And duh, I was given something to knit with the one stitch I know. So I am still on the fence about this...one side of me says I'm doing this to give someone warm clothing, it doesn't matter what stitch I do. The other side of me says, as much as I  like to knit, this project isn't as fulfilling as I thought it would be.

My next project was to play Nintendo Wii at a health center here in New York. When I walked towards the center, I had no idea what to expect. I didn't know if I'd be playing with kids or with adults. Well, I walked through the doors and I was going to be playing Wii with adults who were all in wheelchairs. I was put on a team, and I helped my team members play the games as well as cheered them on. I also got to play, after I all I was on the team. But, I constantly thought maybe this isn't for me even though I had fun.

Here's the thing, I don't think it was a good idea to go play games with a group of people at a health center, since my Aunt Joyce passed away the night before. The whole feeling of being in a hospital already bothered me, but what I realized about my aunt passing, was that I was quite sad because she was one connection I had to my grandmother (who passed in 2004). As I sat there watching other people play games, I really felt like not coming back because I didn't want to get attached to anyone, as I obviously had a hard time losing loved ones.

Then I met Sylvia. Sylvia was a feeble old lady, who was a part of my Wii bowling team. I was amazed by Sylvia because she was so full of life despite her disability, and that reminded me of both my grandmothers. When I first decided to volunteer, I really wanted a project where I could visit elders who had no family or friends to visit them. So I actually thought about going and asking if I could volunteer to visit some of the residents there but I backed out because of my fear. I'm amazed that not only do I have a crazy fear of giving my heart, but I have a fear of simply being kind.

The funny thing was my fear quickly disappeared when Sylvia looked at me when we were all leaving and said "be sure to come next time okay???" I guess this was God's way of showing  me that even though I'm afraid of losing people I love, it's something I will overcome and continue to live my life open to whatever I may receive. And I am happy to say I will be attending my Nintendo Wii games night once again, and I guess the next time I will ask about visiting the residents on my own time:)